


Deep Down Disquiet

by jesterlady



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Angst, Child Abuse, Gen, Introspection, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-04
Updated: 2012-08-04
Packaged: 2017-11-11 09:55:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/477275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jesterlady/pseuds/jesterlady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Logan reflects after the pilot episode</p>
            </blockquote>





	Deep Down Disquiet

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own VM. Title comes from John Houston  
> Warnings for mention of child abuse.

Logan inspected his nose in the mirror and laughed grimly. In a way it was refreshing to have a bloody nose that hadn’t been dealt to him by his father. 

Despite the outcome of the day he wasn’t disappointed in his own share in it. He wasn’t stupid enough to try and fight fifteen motorcycle gang members.

He took out a washcloth and started to wash the evidence off his face. It wouldn’t do for his father to see it. Aaron didn’t like anyone but him touching his son. He might even decide to make up for it by giving Logan a worse bloody nose than Weevil had done.

A beating from his father had started the whole mess anyway. No, Veronica had started it. Hell, maybe he’d started it with his comments about her mother. But whatever the cause he wasn’t sure what the motivation was.

Veronica reminded him of everything he’d lost. She reminded him that life had been bearable for awhile. It might be unfair, but he put most of the blame for Lilly’s death on his once friend because she was the one person connected to everything bad. Her father had gone after Jake, dragging Lilly’s name in the mud, and Veronica had done nothing to stop it. For some reason Duncan had become incredibly despondent and wasn’t the best friend Logan once knew. He was sure it had something to do with Veronica. That had been even before Lilly died. Yes, then she died. The one bright spot in his life.

So he blamed Veronica. So he mocked her. So he punished her for everything she’d done to cause him and Lilly to be broken up and him not be with Lilly on the day of her death.

But she fought back. He had to admit he liked that about the new Veronica Mars. But her stunt had cost him more than his T-bird. It had cost him wounded pride and lost dignity and earned him a two hour trip to the private doctor his mother had on speed dial for just such occasions. Once more Veronica was the cause of his problems.

He could never really repay her the pain she had caused to be brought on him. But he could do something. Something his 09er pals thought was just a prank on someone not in their tax bracket. But it was personal. The only person besides him who knew that was Veronica. Even Duncan couldn’t understand. But in some way Veronica had to know why Logan treated her as he did.

That was why she didn’t want his apology. At least, he thought so. But even if she had, he wouldn’t have given it. He wasn’t capable of letting someone else take anything more from him. He didn’t have anything left to give. 

Satisfied that no one would be able to tell he’d been bleeding, Logan tossed the washcloth and his ruined shirt into a special bag he kept for blood stained articles. He’d take it to the dump in the morning on his way to school. That was one job he always did himself. He then stretched himself out on his bed.

Logan felt a change coming. Weevil was getting uppity. Veronica was much stronger than he'd ever given her credit for. Duncan was slipping further into apathy. His mother drank more and noticed less. His father got more careless in his rages. He himself was sliding closer to an edge and he had to make a decision where to stand. 

He just wondered who would cause the house of cards to finally fall.


End file.
